Indecision

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Do you like your job?
I know so many people who hate what they do, or who they work with, or where they work or all of the above.
The school I worked for was fabulous, and I do not think I am exaggerating a bit. My former co-workers were all or almost all great teachers. I liked them both in the classroom and out of the room, which made my working environment fantastic. The principal I worked under really understood that every good teacher needs room to do their own thing. I felt like I had the ability to be creative and at times, progressive, with the things I did with my first graders.
I mean, c'mon now. How many six and seven year olds have had a unit on culture? How many first graders have had the opportunity to discuss traditions culturally and religiously in their classroom? We talked about race and you know what? It was AWESOME! I did a unit on this after a graduate course on race & ethnicity and my principal was on board.
A friend and co-worker would often joke with me that the district was like the movie Pleasantville. We had a plethora of parents volunteering and unlike some other friends who teach elsewhere, I didn't mind them coming to help in my classroom.
I loved what I did! I felt like I was good at what I did. I felt so lucky to be in a position where I didn't mind going to work everyday.
Then I had Moira and my world changed.
I miss working, yes, however the idea of leaving her every day makes me unbelievably sad. I feel so thankful to be in a position where I do not HAVE to work to make ends meet. Grant it, things would probably be a lot easier finacnially if my paycheck was still coming in, but I don't have to work.
Lately though, the thought of returning to work keeps entering my mind. Yesterday, we went to visit my school and I realized all of my former students had aged out. I have only been gone for a little over one school year, but my kids are now in third grade at the next school.
I enjoyed talking to my friends and seeing siblings of former students. I even ran into a few parents. Luckily, they were parents I liked and who I think liked me! Mo was with me and as usual showed no fear. She was pleasant to all my teacher friends and was hysterical running into a few first and second grade classrooms saying "hi" to the kids. The best though was when we went to visit my friend Laura's room. Laura teaches inclusive pre-school and lucky for us, we walked in just as playtime was coming to a head. Mo eyed up the dolls and the kitchen area, and had a blast playing with the four year olds.
As I watched her play I realized how soon she would be four, and I would be dropping her off to pre-school every day. Wow!
I hate when people tell that it goes by so quick, but seriously, they're right.
For now, I think I'm sticking to my job as a stay-at-home mom. Come January my title will change a bit, as I will add another child to my full time duties and maybe those longings to be back in the classroom will fade.
Like I said, I loved what I did. However, now I love what I do too. Such an interesting dilemma to be in at this point in my life.


My friend Marilyn took this pics of Mo in the teacher's room!