Reaching down, I grab the gallon of milk from under the carriage. My eyes glance and meet hers.
Crap, she's awake.
It is inevitable, that Margo would sleep the entire grocery shopping trip only to wake upon entering the checkout line.
Silently, the prayer enters my brain.
Please God, let her go back to sleep, or just be quiet while I check out.
Exhaling, my hand grabs the other plastic jug. I shimmy around the cart, and place them both on the belt. As I continue unpacking, the noises begin. At fir'. st, just grunts, but then the gasps and gulps that indicate pending unease.
Quicker, quicker, quicker, I unpack.
"Can I have candy, mama?' Maeve asks, hanging precariously on the edge of the cart.
"yeah, me too! Me too!' Mo adds, jumping up and down.
I wipe the sweat from my brow between loading the bag of apples and granola bars. Reminding the girls of the lollipops they had just enjoyed, it's coming.
The cadence of her whimpers have changed. No longer quiet, the crescendo hits the air.
Margo is done.
I am not.
"Mommy, Margo's crying!" Mo eloquently points out.
Suffocating the desire to respond, "No shit!, I take a breath in and through gritted teeth say, "I know babe. Can you talk to Margo baby while Mommy finishes with the groceries?"
"Um, nope. I'm playing with Maeve."
Again, I take another breath, listening to the compassionate voices in the aisles surrounding me. Echoes of "Poor little thing" meet equal part "I don't miss that" and a few audible sighs.
"Shush" I start, "Shush Margo Baby. We're almost done."
Her cries continue, however food remains in the cart.
"Mommy, Margo's still crying" Maeve adds, rolling her eyes from behind the cart. "She not stopping!"
"I know baby, but I have to finish putting the food out and pay." I say. "Margo will be okay."
"Would you mind if I try putting the pacifier in her mouth?" she asks.
I didn't notice her, but at some point the woman had put her cart behind.
"You'd think people would steer clear of this aisle" I joke, "you know with the crying baby and crazy looking mom."
She shares a smile, "Oh no, " she says, "I just love babies and it looks like you need a hand."
As I continue emptying the cart, I hear the nonsense talk we often make towards babies.
"You're too cute! You need to stop crying." she says to my screaming baby.
Her cries subside for a moment.
My eyes meet the lady's.
"Thank you" I say as I place the last of my groceries on the cart.
"Ah you're welcome" she starts, "I just came from a funeral. I needed this. She is so cute and she just made my day better."
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry". I say just as the cries begin again and Mo grabs my hand.
"Margo's crying again, Mama!" Mo says in her sing song voice.
I look to her, just as the cashier interrupts, "M'am I'm all done".
Blogging about boobs, babies, bed lust and everything in between since 2007.
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Monday, February 18, 2013
Etsy, Bitsy, Teeny, Weeny
I'm back on the Monday Listicle wagon, hopefully for good!
(Blowing kisses to Stasha and all my Listicle buds!)
I almost feel like Wendy, from the Stamping Rules knew I was back as she suggested this week's topic. Being consumed with diapers, nursing demands, and attempting to referee two very stubborn little girls in between, I sometimes find myself overwhelmed. In those moments, where my patience is tested, it's those little things that save me.
Today I'll share
Ten little things that currently bring me joy during a chaotic day alone with three little ones
1. Nap time
2. Peanut Butter Granola crackers
3. My daily phone call from my mom to check in.
4. HGTV, Bravo, Food Network & Ridiculousness on MTV
5. Giggles during lunch when Maeve reenacts this scene from Despicable Me
6. The smirky smile and coos from Margo after finishing nursing.
7. After successfully strapping three kids in car seats, placing the key in the ignition and hearing the engine roar.
8. Overhearing Mo share, "Maevie, you're my very best friend!" ten minutes after telling her "I no love you no more! You not my sister!"
9. The seven minutes of alone time in the hot shower while Margo sits in the bouncy seat mesmerized by the waves and the older girls sit on my bed engrossed in an episode of Imagination Movers.
10. That sound of the key in the lock at the front door at the end if the day. I exhale and silently celebrate another successful day of surviving motherhood!
What about you? What brought you some bit of joy or satisfaction today? Link up with Stasha & company
(Blowing kisses to Stasha and all my Listicle buds!)
I almost feel like Wendy, from the Stamping Rules knew I was back as she suggested this week's topic. Being consumed with diapers, nursing demands, and attempting to referee two very stubborn little girls in between, I sometimes find myself overwhelmed. In those moments, where my patience is tested, it's those little things that save me.
Today I'll share
Ten little things that currently bring me joy during a chaotic day alone with three little ones
1. Nap time
2. Peanut Butter Granola crackers
3. My daily phone call from my mom to check in.
4. HGTV, Bravo, Food Network & Ridiculousness on MTV
5. Giggles during lunch when Maeve reenacts this scene from Despicable Me
6. The smirky smile and coos from Margo after finishing nursing.
7. After successfully strapping three kids in car seats, placing the key in the ignition and hearing the engine roar.
8. Overhearing Mo share, "Maevie, you're my very best friend!" ten minutes after telling her "I no love you no more! You not my sister!"
9. The seven minutes of alone time in the hot shower while Margo sits in the bouncy seat mesmerized by the waves and the older girls sit on my bed engrossed in an episode of Imagination Movers.
10. That sound of the key in the lock at the front door at the end if the day. I exhale and silently celebrate another successful day of surviving motherhood!
What about you? What brought you some bit of joy or satisfaction today? Link up with Stasha & company
Saturday, February 16, 2013
First Rule of Fight Club
First rule of sleeping through the night is the same.
You don't talk about the baby who may or may not have slept 10:30 - 4:45 last night.
I expect to be up all night tonight.
Friday, February 15, 2013
2 + 1 =/= 3
Interesting title, right?
Here I am, back to the blog. The place I confess and share, and rant and write. It's been a whirl, my friends.
Ask any first grader what's 2 plus 1, and he will respond 3.
Simple mathematics, but in terms of humans when you have two children, and one more is added, it sure does not seem like three!
There's exponentially more of everything: more noise, more needs, more laundry, and the need for more hands. It is such a monumental change, the addition of this small little being that the norm is gone.
When I had Moira and Maeve, I remember feeling completely and utterly overwhelmed. As I look back, those first few months after their arrivals I frankly was a mess, emotionally fragile and exhausted.
However this time, I am good.
Really, honestly, truly I am.
We're out. We're about. We're doing as much as one can do during the winter in the northeast.
In sharing my feelings this time around with a few people, I was reminded it may be because now, I don't have the time for exhaustion and emotion.
I am the mom to three girls four years and under, I just do not have the time to cry and think about it.
Perhaps, they're right?
Now as for the girls, that's a bit different. Not only has my norm been altered, but so has theirs.
Don't let the pigtails fool you, this one's been trouble!
If one asks the three year old, the addition of a new sister is good...most of the time.
Her place has been usurped. The baby no more, she's not quite sure of this new title- "Big Sister". It could be the joys of being three, or the reaction to having a new baby in the house, or the combination of the two, but any way I look at it, Maeve has developed an attitude. There's been doors slammed, feet stomped in protest, and declarations that "I no love you mommy! You not my best friend!" The blatant refusal to do what I ask is what gets under my skin the most.
Yes, my friends, three has taken over my sweet Maeve overnight. She's not the baby anymore and she's not too happy about it.
I asked the pediatrician at her three year appointment how long I should expect this behavior in relationship to Margo, and her response frankly scared me. Between forced smile she uttered, "Well, we just don't know. It can take some time, months or so!"
MONTHS! MONTHS I have to deal with this?!?!
But then I see a sliver of my sweet girl, and I realize she's still there, just trying to make sense of this new normal.
Moira, however, has basically remained her same easygoing self. While she loves Margo, having a new little sister in the family really hasn't changed things for her too much. She's still top dog and loving it.
Here I am, back to the blog. The place I confess and share, and rant and write. It's been a whirl, my friends.
Ask any first grader what's 2 plus 1, and he will respond 3.
Simple mathematics, but in terms of humans when you have two children, and one more is added, it sure does not seem like three!
There's exponentially more of everything: more noise, more needs, more laundry, and the need for more hands. It is such a monumental change, the addition of this small little being that the norm is gone.
When I had Moira and Maeve, I remember feeling completely and utterly overwhelmed. As I look back, those first few months after their arrivals I frankly was a mess, emotionally fragile and exhausted.
However this time, I am good.
Really, honestly, truly I am.
We're out. We're about. We're doing as much as one can do during the winter in the northeast.
In sharing my feelings this time around with a few people, I was reminded it may be because now, I don't have the time for exhaustion and emotion.
I am the mom to three girls four years and under, I just do not have the time to cry and think about it.
Perhaps, they're right?
Now as for the girls, that's a bit different. Not only has my norm been altered, but so has theirs.
Don't let the pigtails fool you, this one's been trouble!
 |
| Attitude much? |
Her place has been usurped. The baby no more, she's not quite sure of this new title- "Big Sister". It could be the joys of being three, or the reaction to having a new baby in the house, or the combination of the two, but any way I look at it, Maeve has developed an attitude. There's been doors slammed, feet stomped in protest, and declarations that "I no love you mommy! You not my best friend!" The blatant refusal to do what I ask is what gets under my skin the most.
Yes, my friends, three has taken over my sweet Maeve overnight. She's not the baby anymore and she's not too happy about it.
I asked the pediatrician at her three year appointment how long I should expect this behavior in relationship to Margo, and her response frankly scared me. Between forced smile she uttered, "Well, we just don't know. It can take some time, months or so!"
MONTHS! MONTHS I have to deal with this?!?!
But then I see a sliver of my sweet girl, and I realize she's still there, just trying to make sense of this new normal.
 |
| I'm hoping there's more of this! |
This post has taken me some time to finish as my hands have been busy. (I am currently typing with one hand while holding a sleeping babe).
I apologize for the absence. I miss this. I miss having this refuge. I miss my blogging buds, but for the moment my hands are occupied with something, err someone else.
Priorities, my friends, priorities.
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Resolution
It's January. The time of New Year's Resolutions and promises.
Will it be the year to lose weight?
Clean out the junk?
Put yourself on the list of priorities?
I don't do it. I don't make resolutions.
Never had, never intended to.
Sure, there's a list of things running in my head that I need to improve upon, which I'm sure is no different than most people. However the first of January does not seem like the natural starting point, even with the excuse of having given birth nearly 4 weeks ago. I will admit, starting the new year out like that is not my style.
However this year is different.
I have one,
Only one resolution.
Call it peer, I mean partner pressure, but I have succumbed and made one resolution this year.
I guess, it's actually more of a compromise, but given the time of year, I think the term: resolution may work.
This year: I will not be planning Maeve's birthday party. I have given up the manic planning and fully intend to hand over the reigns to her third birthday party to Bryan.
GASP!
Okay, I do realize to the average person this may not seem like a big deal.
I gave birth less than a month ago to my third child.
I have a newborn, a nearly three year old, and a four year old, it's January,and the last thing I should be doing is obsessing over crepe paper lanterns, yarn hair braids, cupcakes, and finding the right shades of purple and yellow while the soundtrack from Tangled plays in the background.
For normal people, party planning should not be all consuming.
However, I am not a normal person when it comes to parties.
I have dove in, head first, into planning these fun little fetes for my girls with dress ups, and games, and desserts galore. I have searched blogs, and party stores, pinned ideas on Pinterest, and scoured for recipes, all to create these fun filled days.
But not this party.
I just cannot do it, and I feel guilty.
Sure, she'll only be three, but for three, Moira got the Wizard of Oz. She got a dress, ruby sneakers, and a faux yellow chalked brick road. She got rainbow cupcakes, pin the heart on the scarecrow, and fruit loop necklaces.
She had hours of my life dedicated to the intricate details of goodie baskets and pinatas.
She had a great party.
And Maeve, well, who knows how this will turn out?
It will be fine.
Yes, it will be a good party.
We'll be surrounded by friends and family who love my kids. We'll eat, drink and be merry.
Bryan's at the helm, so at least we know the food & desserts will be kick ass. My good friend Lynsay has graciously taken over all crafting duties, so Maeve and her guests won't miss out on the homemade touches, and of course, Ashley will be there photographing the event.
Maeve will have a great day and enjoy every second in the limelight.
I know rationally I am not emotionally scarring Maeve because her Tangled party won't be up to "my standard", but I can't help but feel a bit of guilt that I'm not in the driver's seat this year.
Until then, I'm keeping my resolution and not going crazy for her birthday...this year.
However, during late night nursing sessions, I have already started brainstorming ideas for her fourth birthday.
.
Will it be the year to lose weight?
Clean out the junk?
Put yourself on the list of priorities?
I don't do it. I don't make resolutions.
Never had, never intended to.
Sure, there's a list of things running in my head that I need to improve upon, which I'm sure is no different than most people. However the first of January does not seem like the natural starting point, even with the excuse of having given birth nearly 4 weeks ago. I will admit, starting the new year out like that is not my style.
However this year is different.
I have one,
Only one resolution.
Call it peer, I mean partner pressure, but I have succumbed and made one resolution this year.
I guess, it's actually more of a compromise, but given the time of year, I think the term: resolution may work.
This year: I will not be planning Maeve's birthday party. I have given up the manic planning and fully intend to hand over the reigns to her third birthday party to Bryan.
GASP!
Okay, I do realize to the average person this may not seem like a big deal.
I gave birth less than a month ago to my third child.
I have a newborn, a nearly three year old, and a four year old, it's January,and the last thing I should be doing is obsessing over crepe paper lanterns, yarn hair braids, cupcakes, and finding the right shades of purple and yellow while the soundtrack from Tangled plays in the background.
For normal people, party planning should not be all consuming.
However, I am not a normal person when it comes to parties.
I have dove in, head first, into planning these fun little fetes for my girls with dress ups, and games, and desserts galore. I have searched blogs, and party stores, pinned ideas on Pinterest, and scoured for recipes, all to create these fun filled days.
But not this party.
I just cannot do it, and I feel guilty.
Sure, she'll only be three, but for three, Moira got the Wizard of Oz. She got a dress, ruby sneakers, and a faux yellow chalked brick road. She got rainbow cupcakes, pin the heart on the scarecrow, and fruit loop necklaces.
She had hours of my life dedicated to the intricate details of goodie baskets and pinatas.
She had a great party.
And Maeve, well, who knows how this will turn out?
It will be fine.
Yes, it will be a good party.
We'll be surrounded by friends and family who love my kids. We'll eat, drink and be merry.
Bryan's at the helm, so at least we know the food & desserts will be kick ass. My good friend Lynsay has graciously taken over all crafting duties, so Maeve and her guests won't miss out on the homemade touches, and of course, Ashley will be there photographing the event.
Maeve will have a great day and enjoy every second in the limelight.
I know rationally I am not emotionally scarring Maeve because her Tangled party won't be up to "my standard", but I can't help but feel a bit of guilt that I'm not in the driver's seat this year.
Until then, I'm keeping my resolution and not going crazy for her birthday...this year.
However, during late night nursing sessions, I have already started brainstorming ideas for her fourth birthday.
.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
So Long '12
Happy New Year!
Let me share, my favorite photos of 2012.
 |
| January Our Sunshiny Maevie Baby's 2nd Birthday Party |
 |
| February Excitement as we head to see the Laurie Berkner Band |
March
An unseasonably warm day the end of the montt brought out the Ice Cream Man
 |
| April Moira's Fourth Birthday Pirate Parrrrty |
May
Fun at the local street fair
 |
| June We let our little surprise out of the bag! |
 |
| July Fourth of July Bry & Maeve with the fireworks |
 |
| August The four of us at Jeanna & Ian's wedding |
 |
| September Sunset Beach, Cape May NJ A most perfect end to a wonderful beach day. |
 |
| October Boo at the Zoo The morning before the mass distruction of Superstorm Sandy damaged so much of NJ. |
November
Fun with the fall leaves
 |
| December A most perfect Christmas present! All three of our gals underneath the tree. |
We truly have been blessed with a fabulous year filled with lots of fun and family.
Here's hoping 2013 only continues on the same path!
Here's hoping 2013 only continues on the same path!
Monday, December 24, 2012
Just in Time
Here she is,
just in time for Christmas.
Introducing
Margo Elizabeth
December 15, 2012
8 lbs. 20.75 in.
Big sisters Mo & Maeve are just as smitten as their parents with their little sister.
Wishing you a very Merry Christmas!
Birth story to follow.
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