Zip it

Once upon a time, a very nice lady brought her three little girls to the local grocery store.

Aisle, by aisle, she was able to push her cart, fill it with groceries, and keep her children happy. All this was done without any stray comments from other shoppers.

She piled her lot into the car and made it home.

And they lived happily ever after, the end.





What a cute little fictional story, right? 

While I have been able to take my brood to the store and successfully manage to procure our weekly shopping without loss of limb, life, or sanity on a few occasions, the fiction in this story  is that rarely our presence will go unnoticed.

Apparently, my presence with three children in public gives permission for unwarranted comments, advice, nods, head shakes, and in one instance a suggestion to hire a babysitter, as the grocery store is no place for us. 

For the record, in the event I hire a babysitter, there is no way in hell I'm using that time to grocery shop. 

I thought being pregnant brought out the crazies, but it's nothing compared to the reactions I get when I'm out alone with three children. People I have never met before feel it is acceptable to comment and say things like:

Are they all yours? God Bless you!

You must have a lot of patience!

Are you going for the boy?

Ah, I'm sorry. Three girls? 

Wow! Aren't you brave to be here alone?

Don't you have any help?

I don't really get it?

Do I look that bad?
hurried?
tired?
pissed off?

If I do now, it's because of these incessant comments. 

From my Facebook feed and in conversation with those who have three or more children, I realize I'm not alone, and we're in agreement. We do not want to hear it anymore. 

I like that I have three girls. I don't feel like I need nor do I want a little boy.  What I believe is even more surprising is after having two daughters, my husband actually preferred another girl to a boy.

Since I don't want to sequester my children in our home twenty four hours a day, seven days a week, I take them out to places ... alone!

If I'm hiring a babysitter, it's going to be for something good like a pedicure or night out, not to do necessary errands.

Yup, me and three kids hit up places like Target, the library, the local swimming pool, and even weekly trips to the grocery store, without another adult, and we survive.

My life is crazy, don't get me wrong.

I raise my voice a little too much. My house is a little messier than I'd like, and my sheets don't get changed nearly as much as they should. Things are usually loud, frenzied, and crazy. My life as a mother of three little girls five and under can be overwhelming. I dream of sleeping through the night, taking a lazy shower, and peeing with the door shut. I haven't been to the gym in two years, and I just had my first date night out without kids in close to a year this past Friday.

With all this being true, I don't need nor want to hear it anymore. Random ladies and men, keep your mouth shut and opinions to yourself.

Unless of course, you're telling me how my children are well behaved, because then, please, by all means, throw me the compliments. 

I do hope someday I can make through the grocery store without a comment, but until then a mama can dream?