Monday, July 12, 2010

Good Mom, Sucky Wife

Growing up I knew my parents loved each other. I could just see in their eyes that they were each others' soul mates. I did notice one thing, they always put our needs, that is the kids needs, first and at times it was to a fault. My mom mentioned once that it was always all about us, and while I am thankful, I wish my parents spent more time for just them. I'm grateful, don't get me wrong. Looking back, I think it would have been great for just the two of them to have date nights to the movies or dinners out. We would have survived a weekend with an aunt or family friend, so they could go to the beach alone together.
They did finally figure that out, of course, I was in college by then, but they did get their "we" time.
So here I am, this time in the role of the mom and wife and guess what? I seem to be falling into that same trap. If I don't say so myself, I totally ROCK the mom role! My girls seem to be thriving and happy. We do music, play dates, trips, and have fun most of the time doing it. My relationship with my husband, well, it too seems to revolve around our girls. While that isn't a bad thing, I don't think it's the best thing for us.
I can only imagine that there are people reading this that think I'm crazy. But honestly, my relationship with Bry needs to be just as important as my relationship with Mo & Maeve. Our family is not just the kids, it is also Bry and I as husband and wife. We need to make time for just us. To have conversation (and maybe even a meal without chicken nuggets) that is beyond kid talk. We need to have time to enjoy things alone.
Is that selfish?
Perhaps.
But I also think it's good for my girls. Besides the time they will get away from me, because God knows they need it too, it will also give them the chance to see their parents in a healthy relationship with each other.
I need to put some more effort into this because Bry deserves it. He is an amazing dad and pretty good husband too. Hell he puts up with me and that says a lot!

1 comment:

  1. Have no clue who you are but I really needed to hear this tonight. My husband is always on me forbeing an awesome mom but forgetting I'm also a wife. Thanks for the encouraging words.

    ReplyDelete

Let me know what you think.