The women's locker room at the our community pool is as one imagines most bathrooms at summer swimming establishments. Dingy. Cold. Gross.
Walking into the stall, I usher Maeve around me. Her wet ponytail bobbing up and down as she prances on her tiptoes.
"I don't hafta go anymore mama." She says in her usual sing songy voice.
"Um, you just raced out of the pool. You were grabbing yourself. You need to go potty." I say, ushering her onto the toilet. The stall door closes behind me.
Fumbling with the lock, she continues, "Um, why you do that mommy?"
"Excuse me?" I ask. "Why am I locking the door?"
"Uh-huh" she says.
"So no one walks in when you go potty. And so that no one walks in when I go potty next".
Nodding her head, she agrees with "Oh, okay mama."
I am wearing my new black halter bathing suit for only the second time. Tying around my neck and offering a deep v, I am a bit self-conscious of myself. I adjust the cups of my bathing suit, ensuring that things stay put as my nursing boobs seem to have a mind of their own at times.
Maeve watches, from the confines of the toilet seat. Eyes transfixed on my maneuvering.
"Whatcha doing Mama?" she asks.
"Are you done going potty?" I rrespond.
She continues, "I no hafta go. What are you doing with you swimsuit?"
"I'm just making sure it keeps everything covered Maeve". I say. "Now go potty!"
"I done. Why you want everything covered Mama?" she asks.
"Because I don't want people to see my boobs."
The laughter fills the stall. "Mommy" she starts, "We see you boobies now."
"Um, no you can't" I assure her. "My boobies aren't out".
"Yeah. I see you boobies now." she says again, pointing to my cleavage.
"No, Maeve. You do not see my boobs."
"Well," she continues, "I guess I not see ALL you boobs. But I do see them go up and down and up and down when you walk".
And then she starts laughing.
Leave it to my three year old to make me even more self conscious in a bathing suit because of my "girls".